Why do they have so many award shows for people who are rich and famous and already have gigantic egos and don't really need another statue in their house?
I'm accepting nominations for the Cheerios awards . . . awards for people who will never get them otherwise. I'll start off by nominating myself for most frequently "losing" my keys and later finding them still stuck in the lock of the front door.
I'll also nominate my sister for selecting truly the most practical bridesmaid's dresses in the history of the world . . . Black dresses of their choice with a coordinating sash. (My sister Em is getting married! Did I mention that? She also gets the prize for giving me something really exciting to look forward to.)
I'll also nominate Alice for having the skinniest little pair of bird legs that I ever saw on a five-year-old.
And sure, Mark McGuire is a little bit famous, but I don't see him winning any prizes any time soon . . . so I nominate him for creating the greatest one-day depreciation for Michael's Mark McGuire rookie card he's been hoarding since childhood.
Also my Fleabags of 2009 nominees are: Tiger, Octomom, Rob Blagojevich, Balloon Boy's dad, and anybody whose last name is Kardashian.
The categories are limitless! I'll make some good ones up after I see all the nominations for the Cheerio awards. Nominate yourself, your loved ones, or
any of these people. I don't care!
I'll name the winners next week . . . the prize is bragging rights!